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train station dance

Within any culture, there are sub-cultures.  One of which, in these first days in Cameroon, has stood out.  For lack of a better term, I’ll call this one “the Yaoundé train station culture”.

A porter’s job is to ensure that he not only carries his client’s luggage from the vehicle to the station to the train, but also get you settled in “first” so as to use as much of the available storage space as possible.  He has to manoeuvre around all the other porters looking for passenger’s business.  This requires being louder, faster, and more aggressive.

The train attendant is responsible for guaranteeing that only ticket holders are admitted into the train car for which they paid for:  first class, second class, etc.  This requires formality, a no-nonsense attitude and an ability to verbally push back anyone who will not obey their rule of law – which is, admittedly, what they are there to enforce.

In the moment where our porter clashed with the train attendant – shouting back and forth, trying to plough through both the formalities of boarding the train and getting through the masses of people looking to do the same – something entirely unexpected happened.

A man, in casual yet clean-cut clothing, wearing an official-looking badge arrived on the scene.  In the calmest of voices, demeanour and attitude, he asked quite simply “what is the problem?”  The porter pleaded his case in his “job-required” aggressiveness, the train attendant indicating in response that he wasn’t letting him (or us) on because he hadn’t checked the passengers’ tickets, and so on.

“Ah yes, I see.  Then let’s see those tickets please” he said still in his serene tone and stature.  Then he slowly, methodically, inspected each ticket, smiling to each of us in between.  Then declared solemnly that we could board the train.  Have a good trip, he was indicating – a nice, tranquil, relaxed trip.

A simple story really – but an important one in inter-cultural observations.  Everyone had a role to play.  But each role also required a particular attitude, mode of operation and force of personality to be executed so that the “train station dance” could take place.

The official’s entire sense and outpouring of calm in the chaotic atmosphere that is the Yaoundé train station was a lesson in itself:  one must take a step back and look at the situation for what it is.  Looking beyond the roles, beyond the emotions that sometimes cloud a rather simple interaction.

In developing the skills of calmness in chaos, something magical can happen.  A new dance can be created.

Opportunities don’t always come on their own.  One sometimes you have to go looking for them.

We can control the inputs in our lives – and not so much the outcomes.  With a bit of planning, strategizing and a big old push in the right direction, we can create what we most want for ourselves.

Fate or the tempting of fate, either way:  stay in the driver’s seat.  Read more on this here.

The put it out there – and get out there!

No such thing as sitting still.  Time for a major challenge!

Like the seasons, from Fall to Spring (skipping winter, altogether), this coach is taking a plunge into looking at the world through a different lens.  As of November 2009, the [co]imagen coaching blog will go global… or at least will be uploaded from Africa instead of North America!

I’ll be taking on the challenge of a 2-year CUSO-VSO volunteer placement with a local HIV-AIDS focused organization in the Extreme North of Cameroon. Both a personal journey as an executive coach, and a professional “on the ground” assignment to build capacity where it is needed, the blog will begin to reflect aspects of working, living and dreaming big dreams that are universal to everyone, everywhere.

My challenge will be your gain – insights, musings and revelations from a fresh new perspective.  Stay tuned!

Living by example

We are all familiar with “leading by example”, but what if we aren’t looking to lead?  Leadership skills are essential in the workplace and the home, of course.  But sometimes one might just want to live simply – without the top dog position!

Living by example is simply a way to think about how we take action in our own lives based on our values.  If one believes that education is important, then it would be expected that somehow, they include learning in their own lives.  A wonderful French expression speaks to travel as a formative essential to the development of youth.  So one believing in this should encourage travel to young people around them, and then travel themselves.

Seems pretty simple.  So what makes it so hard for people to live out the values they profess to have?  Repeatedly, I head people tell me that they “wish” they could do X and Y, or that they have always “wanted” to do Z.  It’s great to wish a dream, to have stretch goals, however it is so much more wonderful to live them out.

What do you value?

How are you making room for living this value in your life?

What’s one thing you “wished” you could do, that you can start to live out now?

What ever it takes, and in whatever small way, live your values – stretch them a bit even.  No need to lead the world, just lead yourself.  Live it out.

Trying to reach

I was inspired this morning by my yoga routine.  While I was in downward dog, the voice on the DVD said: “touch your heels to the ground – and don’t worry if your can’t quite reach.  Just trying to reach will engage your muscles.”

Exactly the type of inspiration I needed to start my day!  Just trying to do something will engage the muscles – both physical and mental – and help reach closer to the goal.  Important words here:  Trying and engaging.

In everyday occurrences, we sometimes prevent ourselves from trying.  How many times have you heard people say: “It’s no use, I’m just not good at [fill in the blank]”?

Way too many times for my taste.  By not trying to bake a soufflé, run a 10K, finish a crossword puzzle (in ink, if you please!) or whatever it is, you are not engaging the physical and mental muscles that are needed to complete the task.  These are not impossible activities – they do, granted, require some experimenting, training, and practicing. And limited thinking such as above is of no help whatsoever.

Sure, we have to recognize our personal limits.  Yet if we set our limits so low that there is no need to try, we restrict ourselves to what comes easily to us.  Then what is there to learn?  To achieve?  To experience?

Once you start trying, then you start engaging your brain into the task.  You will slowly begin the process of removing the limited thinking.  This will help you bring in the determination to continue trying and engaging further.

What goals/activities/tasks have you stopped trying to achieve?

How would it feel to give it another try?

What would you learn about yourself by trying a little more? A little harder?

In the meantime, my heels still aren’t touching the floor – but they sure are closer now than they were a year ago!  I’ll keep trying to reach.  And engaging.

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